Jack tries to land sponsor Everything You Want To Know About Fran Drescher. Jack hurt his brain a lot. RIP longtime pal George "Space Ghost" Lowe. Brian helps people with dementia. Jack tries to land sponsor Madeline Albright. Jack tries to land sponsor Splax. qmpodcast.com
[00:00:00] How are you, Jack? That's my business, not yours. All right. Sorry to pry. Listen, I have a potential sponsor. Oh, see? For the podcast. Imagine if we were yammering away about how I'm doing and recovering from concussions and all this sort of stuff. Instead, we can be making cold, hard scratch. That's right, Jack. So there's a lot of potential here. And I just need you to read the script that they provided me. Okay.
[00:00:28] And this is for a new podcast. And if they like the read and if they feel like it's professional enough, they will be a regular sponsor of Questionable Material with Jack and Brian, which, as you know, is the name of this podcast. Yes, I know. I know. So I emailed it to you. I'm one of those two guys. As one does. Yep. Well, I haven't gotten it. You know who doesn't use email, Jack? Who's that? Christopher Walken. Is that true?
[00:00:54] It is true. I was just reading about it. He doesn't use email. He's never used email and he doesn't Twitter. Oh, okay. But you know what's interesting? Not yet. He also lives in your town. Is that true? Is that true? I looked it up. Is that true? I looked up notable personalities from your town. One of them is the NPR lady, the lady who hates freedom of speech. Sure. And now runs NPR. And now runs NPR.
[00:01:21] Well, I was going to say that you got to, you got to narrow it down a little bit for the NPR crew. You're right. The lady who's currently heading NPR is from your neck of the woods, same town. Oh, okay. And as is her mommy, who's like a state senator or something like that. Oh, okay. Well, that's cool. Well, fascinating. Here's the problem other than this not being good material for people to listen to. Uh huh. The other problem is that I've not gotten the script yet. Did you accidentally send it to that other dude again?
[00:01:51] Son of a gun. Tell me I didn't do that. I can't tell you for sure. If I sent it to Barney, I'm going to be so disappointed. I keep, that's happened before and they got, you got to want to, please tell me. Because my, for people who don't know, my email address starts with a B. So Jesus Christ. It went to AOL. That's the wrong address. Oh my God. Why have you not deleted that? Why does it do that? I haven't used that in 14 years. I don't, it's not my fault. It's a stupid, like, why would, why would it automatically do that?
[00:02:19] Like you would think my email program would be like, okay, he hasn't used this email address in ages. Okay. Podcast today. Okay. Boy, the victim complex. All right. You would fit in very well in modern times. I'm an idiot. It's not my fault. It's not my fault. I thought the computer was sending it to your AOL address. Oh my God. All right. Now it should be at your Gmail address. I wish I could make that disappear for good. Well, you can delete things, but we'll talk about that later. I have gotten the script. I have clearly never read it. That's a lot quicker.
[00:02:49] Jesus Christ. Okay. That's yeah. Okay. All right. Yeah. Tell me when you're ready. I'm ready to go. Let's do this. Please take it away. Get us this money, Jack. Okay. Count me down. Three, two. Whew. Questionable material with Jack and Brian is brought to you by Fran Drescher's ex-boyfriend, Hank Benedetti, host of the brand new podcast, everything you want to know about Fran Drescher.
[00:03:12] Every weekly episode features three solid hours of uncensored, nonpartisan talk about Fran Drescher, her orgasmic habits, what her hair smells like during the week, as well as Fran's favorite recipes, hypothetical dog training tips Fran might teach us if she had a dog, Fran Drescher orgasm trivia, and in-depth political analysis of how global events impact the sound of Fran Drescher's orgasms.
[00:03:37] If you've been looking for a podcast that is inclusive and diverse, while also very Fran Drescher orgasm centric, look no further. Everything you want to know about Fran Drescher is available wherever podcasts are found. So not in the woods, obviously. Best of all, every episode of everything you want to know about Fran Drescher is absolutely free thanks to a generous grant from the Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation for the Defense of Democracy and Fran Drescher Orgasm Awareness.
[00:04:07] Did I do good? Unfortunately, no, you can't laugh or anything in the middle of delivering a professional read. It's like, it's a bizarre podcast. I'm going to subscribe. Yeah, it sounds great. Count me in. That sounds like good comedy. Three hours. Do you know, is it a daily show? I would hope so. I mean, you know, there's got to be so much to talk about. There's a lot to unpack.
[00:04:36] Unfortunately, we just lost that sponsor, but who knows? Maybe there's another one down the line. All right. Well, let's start the show. Take it away, opening. You're listening to Questionable Material with Jack and Brian. A mostly improvised podcast produced in New York by Jack Helmuth and Brian Sack. QMPodcast.com
[00:05:08] So, Brian, how the heck are you? I'm good, Jack. How are you? You've had a few kerfuffles, as we say, in the business. I have had a few kerfuffles. And if I may, I'd like to just share them with you very briefly. Because, yeah. Tell me what happened. So, I was going intertubing at a ski resort with my kids. They don't know how to ski, so we're going intertubing.
[00:05:31] Um, I struck my head on the wall of ice that sort of keeps the, the, the, um, the tubing lane separate. And it was probably going about 25 miles an hour down the hill. The tube sort of rotates about 90 degrees clockwise, putting my head, uh, in the line of fire of this wall of ice. I smashed my head on the good side.
[00:05:59] In other words, where my one working eye and my one working ear is. I started seeing stars in my one eye. And, uh, that sort of ringing sound like, um, you know, after an explosion in a movie, you know, that, that sound, uh, I was hearing that, uh, in my good ear and having seen spots in my good eye. Went to the emergency room right away. Uh, got a CT scan, uh, was treated marvelously and, uh, no bleeding on the brain or anything.
[00:06:28] Um, too dangerous, no fractured skull, but, uh, a pretty severe concussion. Uh, two days later, I got the flu, had 103 fever with a concussion, which is exceptionally dangerous. And then last week, if I can, this might be a little too personal, but, uh, I had to fly to Michigan to be with my father at a doctor's appointment where he was diagnosed with dementia. So that has been my last two and a half weeks. It's a comedy week.
[00:06:59] Non-stop comedy with questionable material. It's like Thursday night must see TV. I mean, it was just nothing but funny story after funny story. Really good stuff, Jack. Really great. I had a good time too. Okay. I don't think I outdid yours, but my friend died. This might be the concussion talking, but, um, did I ask? No. Okay. But I guess, I mean, go ahead. It's, it's, I mean, certainly it's been a while since we focused on you.
[00:07:29] So, uh, go ahead. Tell, tell me about your life, Brian. No, I was just saying it's been a chaotic couple of weeks. Okay. That's what I'm saying. I'm not saying you outdid me. You had more trauma. Yes. Yes. Uh, you had a friend who died? Well, George, you know, the old voice of the BS of A. For fans of our old TV show, the BS of A for fans of space ghosts, coast to coast. Uh, uh, well, I mean, it's, he's your, he's your buddy. You should do this. He died. He died.
[00:07:56] He went into heart surgery in November and he never really recovered. And this was the second heart surgery. He had, he had a previous one. And that was like 18 months of trying to get back on his feet. Yeah. And I was looking back at our old text messages and I don't think it really registered with me, uh, how bad he was, like how, how, what bad shape he was in. Um, his name was George Lowe. George Lowe. Uh, it was the voice of space ghost for people who watch that show. Uh, it was an incredible voiceover talent. Yeah.
[00:08:25] I mean, really, um, you've, I guarantee you, you've heard his voice on television over the years, whether it's commercials, TV shows, our old show. I mean, he was an incredible talent and a, and a really swell guy. Yeah. Loved his mom. He sure did. He was dev, his mom died in 2018. He never got over it. Yeah. He was still talking about that until the very end. Yeah. Did he ever, did he ever forgive you for it? He, uh, you know, he, he was, I think he was working up to it. Okay.
[00:08:54] Um, where were you guys sort of on that whole thing? He's always like, you know, you shouldn't have frightened my mom like that. And, you know, I just, uh, I was trying to convince him it was a comedy thing. It was my funny, Brian is the ghostly devil routine. You know, you know me, like, I like to leap out of closets. Uh, if there's an old lady kind of by herself in her home and she's cooking something and she's very focused and I'll just storm out of the closet. Like it's time to die. You know, that kind of thing. Yeah. As a, as a hilarious, a prank.
[00:09:23] Usually unless they, they turn around and they're stunned and then they, they dropped a saucepan and then they stagger back and whack their heads on the, on the island in the kitchen. Mm-hmm. And then don't seem responsive and to my cries and shouts for her to turn on the TV so I can watch the news. And that's just what happens. That's life. That's the circle of life. It's the circle of life. Now, I'm not, I'm not going to sit here and criticize you because you've got a great sense
[00:09:52] of humor and your pranks are epic, but you have killed more old people than Andrew Cuomo. Um, that is arguable. Um, you know, it remains to be seen. We'll see what happens in the courts and what comes out during his mayoral campaign. Uh, so I'm hoping that they're going to uncover more skeletons, literally, uh, closets. And, and, and then, you know, maybe I will not have that title because I don't want to
[00:10:20] be known as the guy who kills more elderly than Andrew Cuomo. Well, it's a real coin flip right now. It is. It's, and it's, I don't want to be there. I, I respect that. And I, I totally hear you. Well, I'm very sorry to hear about George. And I'm, I'm happy to honor him with this. George is a great man. Yeah. And I'm sorry to hear about your dad and his dementia. Thank you. Well, you know, it's, it's, it's funny, Brian, because I, it's, it is difficult to talk about. This is, you know, we think it's been going on for a while.
[00:10:49] So it's sort of hard to know how far along he is. It's frontal lobe dementia. What does that mean? It's in the frontal lobe of his brain. I thought you were talking about Lisa Loeb. Cult jam. Well, I mean, I've been wondering where she is. If she has like burrowed into my father's brain, like a worm into RFK Jr.'s brain, that would be cool. Yeah, that would be fascinating, but that's probably not the case. So he's got, is there, is there not frontal lobe dementia? There's like rear, rear dementia. I didn't look into the other types.
[00:11:19] I just know that's the type. And it affects his, his walking. He'll, he'll be walking and his feet freeze. Like literally his feet will just stop moving because there it's registering danger and fear. Like you're likely to fall here. And he just can't move unless he's just gently holding on to like his wife's or my arm. So it's weird.
[00:11:41] Cause I, when I hear dementia, I think of, you know, just kind of like, you're not my son or, you know, are going to walk into the shower with the soup bowl or that kind of thing. You're saying it's more like there's mobility things. Yeah. It's not presidential dementia. It's more of a mobility. Yeah. And, um, however, I think the presidential dementia, uh, version of it might show up at some point in the future.
[00:12:05] I don't know, but, um, you know, I, I love my dad so much and, um, you know, I just want to be there to help him. Hmm. And with that in mind. You know, I was thinking. Oh, what? What he could use. You know, I was about to ask you about this and yeah. Tell me. Just, um, you know, imagine he's kind of minding his own business and then a Brian, AKA scary ghost devil leaps out of the closet that might scare the dementia out of him.
[00:12:34] Is that how it works? I don't know. I'm not a medical professional, but I have dreams. Do you think those two things are some sort of equivalent? Well, it worked for RFK junior. He's now in charge of the health of this country and I don't see why I can't be if I want to be. You know what? You're not wrong. I'm a believer in the American dream. I know the American dream is real. So why not? Why not you? Let me in. Meritocracy me.
[00:13:04] Now I know as you, I know you just said that of course you're not a medical expert. However, you are on, um, I think the Mayo clinics, uh, dementia board of advisors. I am on the Mayo. Yep. I'm on the Mayo clinics and the Miracle Whip clinic. Both. It's, it's two very different types of Mayo. Huge. Yeah. They're very big. Yeah. Both, but I'm, yeah, I'm on the board of both. Uh, keeps me busy.
[00:13:33] And I, I would like you to draw on your advice from either board. Cause you certainly, you must've learned a lot from both places where I know you spend a heck of a lot of time. I, I'd love like a little guidance as a family member who now has to deal with a loved one with dementia. It's like, I would love just some sort of tips and tricks on how to, um, how to deal with it and, and, and how to relate and maybe some, um, some ways to sort of help him, uh, with that. So, you know, I just would love to pick your brain about that. Is that all right?
[00:14:03] Yeah, absolutely. And feel free to draw on, on, on all of your Mayo experience. Okay. So, you know, as, as a loved one, I know there's support groups sometimes for people who are suffering. Um, I don't think I necessarily need that right now, but I would, I would love to know, you know, what are some tips for family members to deal with, uh, people who have dementia? Uh, well, you, you, you know, you want to keep their brains active. Yeah. Okay. You want their, cause you know, they, what happened to you, the brain starts going,
[00:14:30] we call it stale and you know, it starts, so it gets like sedentary at atrophy. So you got to keep it busy. So what you do, uh, is you, I, I have a variety cause I had a, uh, an uncle with dementia and a great uncle. And so, uh, to keep his mind going, I had a lot of, uh, various portraits. Oh, that I would just, I would place on, you know, uh, on his nightstand. Okay. Different faces every night, every night, like a different face of a person so that they would
[00:15:00] look at that and say, who is that? Who is that? Who is that person there? And so one night it might be Morgan Freeman and the next night it might be a cat. And then the next night it might be an actual relative of his, but you, the idea is to keep him guessing so that the dementia fibers can't really make their way into the brain. That makes sense because Morgan Freeman was never a part of his family.
[00:15:26] And so the brain automatically sort of puts up some sort of defense barrier. Uh, unfortunately for my great uncle, he put Morgan Freeman in the will. There's a lot of money in the, with him. I, and that side of the family. Yeah. So unfortunately I, I, um, I lost out there cause it was divided amongst Morgan Freeman and a giraffe and, um, just Kate Winsdale.
[00:15:50] And just like a lot of, it's just, it's just, it's, it wasn't in retrospect, I wish I had maybe had him modify the will, uh, prior to putting these photos out. Right. Right, right, right. And, um, let me just ask you, uh, so some, some of the money went to Kate Winsdale. Um, is that a sign of dementia sort of combining Kate Winslet with Kate Beckinsdale? Um, that's, that's funny you say that because, you know, the other morning I was getting up
[00:16:18] and there's a picture on my nightstand. Well, that's, what was the picture? It was Sammy Davis Jr. Uh, I mean, I came to learn that, but I turned to my wife and I was like, is this our kid? And she just looked at me and said, yes. And then, but she was really just trying to jog my brain. She said, just test me. And, and how, what is it like sort of sharing a bed, uh, with your wife these days as you are apparently developing these symptoms?
[00:16:49] Um, and you know, well, she's, she's doing her best to kind of keep my brain from atrophying. She put on a Cab Calloway mask the other day. Um, which we all kind of jarred me as I was falling asleep. Yeah. Kind of opened my eyes and there's Cab Calloway and, um, you know, scat man crothers, you know, it's always different, but it keeps me going. And what about, you know, I, we occasionally go there.
[00:17:13] We're both open to our personal lives, um, in the lovemaking, um, realm, you know, how, how has your affliction sort of affected that level of your relationship? Well, um, so she started screaming, you know, um, um, Oh, John Cusack, John Cusack, famous actor, John Cusack. She says that you're so good. You're so good. Yeah. Uh, and I just was pounding on the bedroom door saying, please open this up.
[00:17:47] She wouldn't let me in. That's okay. So, all right. So not much has changed. No. Okay. Well, you know, thank you for sharing that. It's gotta be hard. Thank you, Jack. Thank you. Thank you. Yes. Um, okay. So, you know, my, that's really great advice about, um, the, the, the picture frames. Yeah. You know, what are some different, um, ways that we can, um, work on his mobility, uh,
[00:18:15] you know, as he has, uh, as he works through, uh, dementia, what, you know, there's gotta be some things that you've learned at the Mayo Clinic about this. Yeah. Well, so you, like, as you were saying, like he has this tendency to just kind of stop moving, right? Yes. Which, which you don't want. Cause you know, he could lose his balance or something walking downstairs and suddenly stop. He might fall. Uh, so what we do is we have a bucket of marbles and we just kind of, we just dump it all over the floor.
[00:18:41] And what that does is like, if he, even if he decides he's going to stop moving, suddenly he's going to keep moving cause he's standing on several marbles. Oh, that's great. Yes. So that way you don't have this sudden jarring stop. He's going to keep moving forward or to the side or backwards. It just kind of depends on the marbles. Sort of like the, um, sort of like in last week's show with the, uh, where we had the Doge guys on, they talked about a slide that sent people great distances. That seems sort of similar. It is.
[00:19:11] It's a similar idea. Yes. Huh? Well, that's, that's really good advice. Just to be honest with you, Brian. Thank you. Jack Mayo Clinic. Yeah, no, that's, that's really great. Great. And, uh, you know, I just, I guess, you know, my final question is, um, what are some other signs that we need to start looking for, um, where things might be getting worse? Well, uh, let's say, uh, you know, you, you tell them to, it's a, we call it the BLT test. Okay. What?
[00:19:39] Which is the bacon, lettuce, and tomato test. Yeah. And what we do is we tell the dementia patient and we need you to make a bacon, lettuce, and tomato sandwich. Okay. And they'll, uh, you know, they'll look at you. Okay. And they'll, uh, and then you watch them. Yeah. Um, so if they go into the garage already, that's a no, you need to guide them. Yep. Yep. Yep. You know, you're hoping that they go into the kitchen. So they go in the kitchen. Okay. We've, we've, we've, that, that obstacle is clear. They've gone in the kitchen. They associated a BLT with a kitchen.
[00:20:09] Yes. Now, if they go into the kitchen and then they start rifling through the, the freezer. Yep. Well, we know we don't keep bacon, lettuce, tomato, or bread in the freezer like that. Right? Yeah, of course. Maybe bread, but none of these other things are in the freezer. So that's kind of a bad sign. Sure. Now, if they take pillows and they start smearing pillows with mayonnaise or Miracle Whip, we know there's a, there's a problem, right?
[00:20:37] Because those don't, these, that's not how you make a BLT. Uh-huh. You following me? I mean, I am. I, I, I think I would have rather have had advice from the other Mayo Clinic that not to criticize. Oh, that, I don't know. All right. If he, if he starts slathering his pillows with mayonnaise, uh, I'll, I'll call you right away. Absolutely.
[00:21:06] Well, Brian, uh, thanks for this advice. Uh, you know, thanks for listening to my, uh, to my problems, everybody. Yeah. Yeah. You know, and good luck to you. Thank you. And good night. No, I mean, let's, we're like middle of a podcast. So no, no, I reject that. It's a good movie. Princess Jackalberry. Uh, I guess I'll respond to that. Yes. We have a potential sponsor. Oh, good. And you know how it goes.
[00:21:35] We just need a professional read. Fine. Character quality professional. Uh, I sent it to you, hopefully not to your AOL address or to my friend Barney. Hopefully it's going to you. Yes. I have it here. So you. You have led the way of professionalism by sending it to the right person. Correct. And, uh, I'd like you to start reading it as soon as possible, Jack, so we can start earning that money. Three. Oh boy. Two. One. Never read this before in my life.
[00:22:03] Questionable material with Jack and Brian is brought to you by the ghost of Madeline Albright. Well, come on. Although dead for nearly three years, Madeline Albright is still ever present in your life. She likes to watch you take showers. She's there when you tuck your kids in. She watches your kids sleep. And when you and your significant other are doing stuff, she's watching, smiling, and offering you valuable tips that you can't hear unless you have a ghost lady microphone,
[00:22:32] which you don't because it hasn't been invented yet. Madeline may have shuffled off her mortal coil, but the former secretary of state remains among us. She's a joyful spirit who wants the best for you, even when she watches you picking your nose. So nasty. Madeline doesn't like that. She saw what you did. Also, Brad Harper lets his dog shit on the beach and doesn't pick up after it. That makes Madeline angry. And you don't want that.
[00:23:00] That risks her turning into a lady ghost Hulk screaming at you in Hulk ease, which would sound terrifying if you could hear it, which you can't because they need to invent a lady ghost Hulk microphone. They haven't yet. Not sure why. What are you waiting for, Jews? Jesus. Start inventing that stuff so that you can hear Madeline's ghost. She'd like to be mayor of New York. I'm not sure what the ghost of Madeline Albright is actually selling, but she's a proud sponsor of questionable material with Jack and Brian.
[00:23:29] Bunch of whack dildos. Shoot. That one was crazy. So Madeline Albright screaming Hulk ease. I guess that's a weird visual. And the weird comment about the Jews, which is, you know, borderline offensive and kind of complimentary because there, if anyone can solve the problem, it's them. Disproportionately invent things. Absolutely.
[00:23:59] It's an incredible class of people. Wow. Well, that is goodness gracious. I'm sorry. I ate that one. I don't need to ask. I, yeah, you know it right off the bat too. That's a bummer. I know. I disappointed Madeline Albright in that one. Yeah. She's nice. Nice short lady. Yeah. Short. Short. And, and, and, and you had said the, the, the one thing back in her living days, you had one sort of like very keyed in descriptor of Madeline Albright. What was that again? Tiny.
[00:24:29] I stood next to her for a photo. Uh-huh. And she was very short. Extremely. She was almost, I think she, she commented on like Kim Jong-il. Yes. How short he was. Yep. And he had like platform shoes so that he could be a little taller than her. Oh God. Okay. Clown. Crazy clown. Well, Brian, uh, let's move on with the show and hopefully I'll get one more chance at the end. Nope.
[00:24:59] So Brian. Yeah. Um, you know, let's get right into it. Yeah. You, you know, we've talked about medical things. We've, we've, uh, you know, had a good show so far, but we haven't sort of touched pop culture. No. And, you know, I know you're a bit of an expert. We've done this in the past where you have researched different musical artists songs and know the true meaning behind them. You're, you're really good at this.
[00:25:25] I think we've done some Beatles and, you know, perhaps some Rolling Stones, Michael Jackson songs, Madonna songs. You, you give insight into these music, you know, these musical legends in a way that, you know, so many other people can't. And, and I know in conjunction with that level of expertise, you're also working on a Taylor Swift biography, an unauthorized biography. Yes, I am. Yeah. The time has come as we say. Yeah, absolutely. Well, that's so exciting.
[00:25:52] What, um, what's the name of your Taylor Swift unauthorized biography? James Taylor, an unauthorized biography. Now, do you think when you hear Taylor Swift that you just think that means James Taylor moving at a rapid pace? Um, that's what I had thought. And that's where I devoted a lot of my energy and research. Oh man, I don't imagine there's a big market for that, but I could be wrong.
[00:26:21] Um, you know, that was, I was, cause I was always saying he, man, he comes up with songs so fast and that's where they're like, yeah, well, you know, and then when I heard Taylor Swift, that's the first thing I think of. Yeah. Is you just yesterday morning. He came up with that in minutes. Yeah. He's fast. I guess so, but I'm not sure, not sure it's right. No. And the publisher's pissed. I bet. I bet that's true. He's not as timely as she is, is what they keep saying.
[00:26:49] Well, that's, that's highly debatable. So, but that doesn't change the fact that you definitely, uh, know her songs. Oh yeah. Taylor Swift songs, mind you. Backwards and forwards. Is that right? Oh my God. I have, um, a lot of playlists on my, uh, Apple music and most of them are Taylor Swift. Oh, that's really great. What are, um, what are the, can you give me just one playlist that's not Taylor Swift that you've got?
[00:27:18] Uh, the, you know, the, uh, uh, songs against Bananarama. So it's, it's songs that are basically the theme is Bananarama sucks. Oh man. I didn't know that was a sub genre. It is. And, um, you know, it's kind of like up there with Sky and Emo. Huh? Okay. Well, there we see. This is why you're the musical expert. I didn't know that. Yeah. Yeah. So there are a lot of diss tracks and stuff against Bananarama. Yep. Hmm. Who is their sort of main, um, competitor?
[00:27:48] Young MC. They had beef. They had huge, I mean, I can't believe you've never heard of it. They, they did not get along. Where did that come from? Well, I mean, Bust a Move was about beating up Bananarama. If you listen to the lyrics. I didn't know. This is a great insight. Yeah. So like, you know, a lot of people think that it's about like some guy trying to meet a girl or something like that.
[00:28:13] But if you listen to the lyrics, it's, it's all about, uh, beating up Bananarama. Can you, like, like, um, she says, hello, something, something you find fellow. Yeah. She says, hello, Bananarama sucks. No. And say. Oh, I, sometimes they go so fast. I don't hear them. Yeah. Huh. Don't, don't just stand there. Bust a Move. Okay. Okay. Shorty.
[00:28:43] Standing on the wall, like a cheap tuxedo. Bananarama sucks. They took my Fritos. Cause he was huge in the junk food at the time. He doesn't do it anymore. He doesn't eat processed foods. Well, that's good. It's well, I'm sure a old MC is going to appreciate that health choice. Yes. He's, um, he's, he's pre-diabetic, but he's, he's in good shape. Amen. Good, good for him. Well, okay. So let's, let's get right into some of Taylor's biggest songs and you can tell us, I mean,
[00:29:13] boy, the, the heat we're going to get for this episode of the podcast is going to be just humongous. I can only hope. All right. So, uh, Taylor Swift age 35. She's only 35 net worth $1.6 billion. That's a lot of money. It seems like a lot of money. Yeah. Um, uh, you know, one of her, um, big early songs that got a lot of radio play wildest dreams. Yep. Tell us what the Taylor Swift song wildest dreams is all about. If you don't mind.
[00:29:44] Wildest dreams. Yes, please. Yeah. It's about a Gene Wilder. Really? Yeah. Uh, okay. I mean, if you think, you know, Taylor Swift has, you know, she's really kind of patterned her, her image after Gilda Radner. Yeah. Okay. I guess. You see it? Yeah. I sort of see it. Yeah. And so, uh, so she, and Gilda Radner, of course, was married to the gentleman we're talking about. Gene Wilder. Yeah.
[00:30:14] Your frontal lobe. Yeah. My frontal lobe just, it throbbed for a second and then, and then all came back to me. Okay. This is very interesting. Yeah. So, well, so basically it's a play on words like your wildest dreams. But it's about basically her having a life with, um, Gene Wilder and, and pushing Gilda Radner off a cliff. Oh my gosh. Yeah. So that's, that's her wildest dream. Yeah. She wants to be Gene Wilder's lover.
[00:30:43] Now, does Taylor realize that Gilda died from cancer, uh, about 40 years ago that she, and that she's with your mommy right now in hell? That's the title of her next album. Is it really? So what is the exact wording of the title? Uh, Gene Wilder's wife Gilda died of cancer and is now with Brian's mommy. That's, that's, um, it's longer than eras.
[00:31:15] It is. Well, I can't wait to, you know, I can't wait to hear all the tracks. Oh yeah. I'm excited. Well, that's really easy. Well, thank you for that. That is really interesting information. Now there's a, of course, a Taylor Swift song, uh, that, uh, many of us really know well. Uh, and that is shake it off. Yes. Shake it off. Shake it off. And I don't want to sing it cause then we'll get to, you know, uh, also cause I'm bad at it. Um, shake it off. That's interesting song title. Tell us, tell us about that.
[00:31:42] That's, that's about being at a truck stop restroom and using the urinal. And not knowing what to do when you're done. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. She's envisioning it. She's a female. She was assigned female at birth. She's a cisgender. And so, you know, she's just imagining what it's like to be standing at a urinal at a truck stop in Boise. Wow. Yeah.
[00:32:08] That's, and what was it that, that, uh, drew her to that, um, that story that she needed to tell it? Well, because she, she's never peed at a urinal. You know, she, one time she walked into a men's room by accident and she saw these things hanging on the wall and she had never seen them before in her life. And she thought it was some kind of a hand washing machine that men had. And she was upset that, that she never saw any in the women's room. Women only had toilets and it didn't make any sense. It was unjust.
[00:32:39] Yeah. Not inclusive. Right. And then somebody kind of informed it, no, those are urinals and only men can use them. Right. Uh, because the, the way the anatomy works. And then, so she, she thought about that for a second and then she came up with a song. She sat in a, underneath a geodesic dome. And, uh, meditated for a few minutes and then can't, and imagined in her mind what it would be like to stand in a urinal and shake it off. Yeah. That's wild.
[00:33:08] So a lot of people assume that most of Taylor Swift songs are about sort of ex-boyfriends, including some famous ex-boyfriends. Mm-hmm. Um, Jake Gyllenhaal, for example. Mm-hmm. But you know, this is a really interesting insight. Yeah. More where that came from. I'm going to challenge you on that. Uh, where does the song Bad Blood? Because now we've got bad blood. Where does that come from? What's the genesis of that song? Because that was a very popular song on the radio for a long time. Well, yeah.
[00:33:36] So back in the eighties, uh, a young hemophiliac was given a blood transfusion and unfortunately it contained the HIV virus. Oh. And so. Man. Yeah. He was famously, you know, diagnosed with AIDS as a young kid. And it was a sad time because, you know, people didn't know about the disease. They would stay away from him because they thought he was contagious. They tried to keep him out of school. You know, it was very sad.
[00:34:02] So Princess Diana came in and, and, uh, you know, to, and met with him to show that he wasn't contagious. Yep. And then she went back and was killed in a car crash days later. A lot of people think there was a connection. I don't. Uh-huh. I think it was just a coincidence, but you do have the, you do have the Diana Truthers. Yeah. I mean, I'm, I'm among that, that crew, but we don't have to get into that. Let's not. And so, so basically it's about the tainted blood.
[00:34:33] Oh boy. And, and she wasn't even, you know, at 35 years old, she was not really, uh, that, uh, was she even alive in the eighties? I think, I think she was born in 89. Yeah. Yeah. She read about it on an Instagram post. And she wrote a, a bestselling, one of her most popular songs ever. Yeah. Well, she, she saw that and it was kind of inspiring. And she went and she sat underneath a geodesic dome and meditated a little bit more and she came up with it. Okay.
[00:35:02] Uh, well, that's the, that's the story there. And the last one, you know, the song, uh, anti-hero, there's a, uh, billboard lists her, her top 50, um, songs of all time. And they have anti-hero at number three. Anti-hero. Very interesting. I don't even know what that could be about. Can you tell us what Taylor Swift song anti-hero is really about? Yeah. It's about Hiro Matayoshi. It's a Japanese individual in world war two.
[00:35:30] Well, more history she's not alive for. Yeah. Well, she spends a lot of time on Wikipedia and Reddit, especially today I learned and so history memes. And so, uh, Hiro Matayoshi was the leader of a group they did. They conducted the horrible biological experiments on prisoners. Sure. And, uh, and so, and, and Taylor's always been against conducting, uh, biological experiments on prisoners.
[00:35:56] I don't know if you, that was a subject of, of several of her songs. Kind of like she's the Greta Thunberg of biological experimentation on prisoners. But Taylor Swift, like, you know, has an education. Yes. And, and she's not autistic and she's attractive. And so she's got a lot going for her. Right, right, right, right, right. But, you know, does have that passion against a biological experimentation on, on prisoners. Also, she doesn't, um, hate the Jewish people. That's true.
[00:36:26] Another difference between the two. And her parents aren't communists. Hmm. Okay. Uh, okay. Well, we've certainly covered the Greta Thunberg thing, but so, so then, so she learns about this, um, this, uh, Japanese, uh, soldier from world war two hero. Yeah. Yeah. And, and, and so what is the, what's, what's she really sort of singing about? What's the, what's the hook? Uh, what's the, the heart of that song? Well, you know, I don't know. I don't have the lyrics in front of me. Yeah.
[00:36:54] No, I don't need the lyrics, but like, what's the, yeah. Well, yeah. It's like, no, you shouldn't do that. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You shouldn't do that. Don't, don't do it. Don't do it. Don't inject that into her. And that's the anti-hero. Yeah. Huh. She's anti-hero. He's in, she's anti-hero Matayoshi. Boy, she's just always taking men down. She, yeah. I mean, that's, it's a living. It pays pretty well. It does. Yeah.
[00:37:24] It really does. I'm going to, I'm going to start writing songs about dudes. What's your first one that you have, um, that you have in mind? Don't put that there. That's a song about every man. It's about every man, but also the man in the bookstore. All right. Well, be, be sure to let us know when that thing drops on Spotify. Okay. Thank you, Jack. Thank you, Brian. Great job. You too. Thank you.
[00:37:58] So, um, anything that we need to still do here before we say goodbye to everybody? Um, yeah. Oh, like what? Oh, I have a potential sponsor. Oh my gosh. Well, this is the day I'm going to not laugh and I'm going to book it. You know, that would be nice because I keep coming with these sponsors. It's kind of a pain in the butt. Yep. Watch your language. Sorry. Pain in the rear. Thank you. Hole. And, and then, you know, I, I, I get these. Like from the song, don't put it there.
[00:38:28] Yeah. Don't put it. The bookstore song. Dirty old man with the beard. And so my, you know, so it's very frustrating for me to, to go out there and find these potential sponsors. Yeah. Yeah. Have them write these commercials for you to read. Okay. Okay. It's flubbity dubbity as we say in the voiceover business. Yeah. I know that's the big saying in the voiceover business. So Jack, I sent you the script. Okay. It's for a product called Splax. Splax. Okay. Yeah. Um, okay.
[00:38:57] I don't know what that is. I've never heard this before in my life. Count me down. I'm going to nail it. Here we go. One. Read it. Questionable material with Jack and Brian is brought to you by Splax, the new dietary supplement made with the best of intentions. Now that we've removed most of the lead, Splax has a lower chance of making your kids mentally deficient. That means more time doing the things you love and less time asking Jason why he shat on the sofa.
[00:39:26] Splax is all natural and completely organic. If you change the definition of the word, Splax is high mercury content makes it the envy of tuna everywhere. Just take one Splax tablet with every meal and you'll find yourself more awaker, more alerter, more energy-er and happier than an Islamist on beheading day.
[00:39:51] Splax contains a lot of vitamins like the one and the, like the A one and the B one and some riboflavin and one that starts with an N. It also has new vitamins that you've never heard of, but what your body needs like vitamin Jeff and also the one that doesn't put cancer in your bum. Splax comes with a money back guarantee. So what's keeping you? Come on, buy Splax. Huh. Well, can't laugh when you're doing a commercial.
[00:40:21] It's the first thing they teach you in voiceover school. I didn't graduate from voiceover school, okay? George Lowe would be rolling in his grave if he were buried yet, but he's not. He's rolling in the low temperature containment system that he is currently in. He is. We miss you, George. Buddy. Oh, well, I'm sorry. But let's, on that note and of me failing at the, at this, let's end the show. Yes, Jack. I would do that immediately. Post haste, as we say.
[00:40:51] Let's just ask. Presently. Let's end the show. Please, please give us five stars on whatever platform you listen to this crap on. And maybe, maybe write us a nice review. We read every single one and. Not reading anymore. No, you will read them. Okay, fine. I'll read them. It's also a bit of an aphrodisiac. So we need that. That's right. For the bookstore guy. Sexy lady. Good night, everybody. Good night, Jack. Good night, Brian.
[00:41:22] That was Questionable Material with Jack and Brian. Subscribe on any podcast platform. Visit us at QMPodcast.com. yesterday. Thank you. All right. You